Self-centredness: when does it turn into narcissism? And when isn’t it narcissism yet really?

June 11, 2011 § Leave a comment

Some quick thoughts… I read a posting on a blog this morning and it triggered these thoughts (actually a little ironic) together with other thoughts and recent personal experiences.

You can hear (I think many of us have heard this from an early age or been met with a message more or less explicitly saying):

“Don’t be so self-centred!”

But this is a safe way of making the child exactly this, whether you see it or not?That latter adult either behaves like he/she is invisble or the opposite or both? And on top he/she feels maybe also easily guilt for wanting (and sometimes needing) space? Something that doesn’t make things better.

And if you are self-occupied why are you?

And more interestingly: How are you cured from this?

Are you by saying to yourself or by being told:

”Be less self-centred!”

I’m quite ironic and sarcastic here. Because I wonder if those who are blamed for being self-centred aren’t those who are causing other people less problems? Compared to those you really could and should react at?

Can circumstances also make some people more self-centred, or expressed differently: more self-aware? There can be circumstances where you really blossom and grow, and others where you experience the opposite.

And there can also be a snobbishness over how people express themselves. How they use the language… Not to talk about how they are spelling. What does THIS say about the ones looking down on other people’s writings, unless those aren’t expressing horrible opinions?

I have a niece and a nephew who are dyslectics, but at least the niece is expressing herself gladly despite her bad spelling.

Yes, this about changing people… Why are we? And how do we deal with what and those we should really need to deal with? People really causing harm, and a lot of harm…

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